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Expert Q&A:
How can I stop my 2-year-old from picking her nose?

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Lawrence Kutner
Answered by Lawrence Kutner Ph.D.
Meet our authors
"I'm a clinical psychologist, a consultant, and a journalist," says Lawrence Kutner, "which is a great combination for someone who's nosy."

Lawrence Kutner, Ph.D. (www.drkutner.com), is a nationally known clinical psychologist who trained at the Mayo Clinic. From 1987 to 1994 he wrote the award-winning, weekly New York Times column "Parent &; Child," which was syndicated globally. From 1991 to 1999 he was the child behavior and "Ask the Expert" columnist for Parents magazine. He's also a former talk show host on KGO radio in San Francisco.

He is on the psychiatry faculty of Harvard Medical School and Massachusetts General Hospital, where he is co-director of the Harvard Medical School Center for Mental Health and Media. In addition, he's on the board of advisors to the Rosalynn Carter Mental Health Journalism Fellowship Program at the Carter Center in Atlanta.

Dr. Kutner has been a consultant to the Children's Television Workshop, the Johann Jacobs Foundation (Zurich), the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States, and to major universities and corporations throughout the United States and Europe. He is a frequent guest on national television and radio networks. He received his bachelor's degree from Oberlin College in Ohio and his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University of Minnesota. His recent books include Parent &; Child: Getting Through to Each Other, Pregnancy and Your Baby's First Year, Toddlers and Preschoolers, Your School-Age Child, Making Sense of Your Teenager, and Grand Theft Childhood: The Surprising Truth About Violent Video Games and What Parents Can Do.

Dr. Kutner is the father of a 18-year-old son as well as a 30-year-old foster son from Romania. He and his family live outside of Boston, Massachusetts.
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Question


How can I stop my 2-year-old from picking her nose?

Answer


Relax. This is one of those situations in which the best thing you can do is nothing.

Researchers have found that it's usually ineffective to try to get children to change problem habits such as nail-biting, nose-picking, and thumb-sucking until a child is at least 4 or 5 years old. In fact, trying to correct those habits—especially by doing things like smacking the child's hand—can make matters worse.

That's because these habits are not conscious and are often triggered by anxiety. If you punish the child for the behavior, it raises her anxiety level. This makes her more likely to pick her nose even more.

So right now you should simply ignore her when she picks her nose, unless she's doing it so much that she's getting infections. (If that's happening, talk to her pediatrician.) Odds are that she'll spend less time with her finger up her nose when she gets a year or two older.
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